waiting

Isa. 30:18
Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore He exalts Himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are those who wait for Him.

2 Cor. 12:9--He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness."

I believe suffering is necessary for growth. And I've been doing a LOT of that lately (i meant growth but i guess both works). I'm gonna keep growing, of course. haha, i'm a LONG way off from finished, but I have come a long way since last week. Sunday night was my first Catacombs and it started my week off wonderfully.
I was doing so much better...much happier even though I was so stressed out with all the WORK I've had this week. it's been insane. 3 exams, and daily quizzes, tons of reading.... tis life at Gordon! And I think that actually helped me. Lots of work is a good thing these days. Tonight was really hard, and actually all day it has been really hard having a positive/happy attitude.
As I said, I'm still growing and still working. Still laying it at Christ's feet and learning how to better/more completely trust HIM to get me through!

verses for the day

"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." -Psalm 147:3

"Behold, God is my helper; the Lord is the upholder of my life. He will return the evil to my enemies; in your faithfulness put and end to them. With a freewill offering I will sacrifice to You; I will give thanks to Your name, O Lord, for it is good. For He has delivered me from every trouble, and my eye had looked in triumph on my enemies." -Psalm 54:4-7

"Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore He exalts Himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for Him." -Isaiah 30:18

"Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved." -Psalm 55:22

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. 'The Lord is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in Him.' The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord..." Lamentations 3:22-26

"For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be glory forever. Amen." Romans 11:36

I've been blogging a lot lately. This is weird! But I need it. Soooo bad.
Last night was my first dance practice!! Or do we call it a class? rehearsal? I'm not sure but it was FUNNNNNNNNN and got my mind off everything for an hour and a half!!!!! It was SOOOO needed. We started learning a combo and danced our hearts out to it. SO GREAT!
Tonight I had my first CATACOMBS practice and it went REALLY well! There are lots of cool people in the band, there is only one other newbie, and she's a freshman. So it's pretty cool. I'm pretty fortunate to have been picked!!! I feel special.
We did a lot of CHILLIN and getting to know each other--had dinner together, talked, messed around a little (okay, a lot)... then sang/played for an hour! We're practicing for Sunday night and i CAN'T WAIT.
My voice is seriously lacking today. Ok, that's an understatement. I really don't HAVE a voice. I got sick yesterday and have slowly been losing my voice. Now after all the singing i REALLY don't sound good. It's pretty funny though. Surprisingly I managed to somehow still sing even with a croaky voice. Not singing my BEST but sing, after all, which i'm thinking is a great accomplishment right now.

I saw the Chiropractor today and thankfully I didn't have another big break down in his office like last week. That was embarrassing. I just started crying right there. And was pretty blinded by tears the whole way home on my bike. I'm sure people in cars were probably like WHAT THE HECK is wrong with her? Is she dying? That's a story I guess I can share. It was interesting. Last thursday morning I went to the chiropractor, and he noticed I looked really tired and kept pressing me to figure out why, so i finally told him i didn't get much sleep, and why...etc... and started crying. Started crying much more outside, and while I was in my own little world of sadness, I saw a blind man crossing the street. He was not at a cross walk and this street was very busy. I stopped to watch him just to make sure he made it ok, and right then, he ran into a stopped car! :-( I FELT SO BAD FOR HIM! I forgot about MY little problems in life and MY emotions and just thought WOW. I have such a good life compared to that guy. I am so blessed. I can see! That poor guy was trusting his walking stick to cross a street, and his walking stick went under the car between the wheels so he didn't know it was there and he smacked right into it! SAD DAY!! That of course made me cry all the harder. I think it was God showing me I have it good. I have so much to be thankful for and don't need to be feeling sorry for myself. Stuff happens but it shouldn't change our whole mood and attitude. I take things for granted too much. I'm thinking this blind guy could have definitely been an angel or just someone God sent me to show me that everything is okay. I am okay and I will be OK.

I'm going to the chiropractor one more time tomorrow to evaluate what's goin on,... to see if the 6 weeks of treatment did anything... i think he'll take more x-rays or something. My shoulder has been SO much better. I really love chiropractors now:-)

It's already the middle of the week and i'm SOOOO GLAD!! I need the weekend! Thankfully school work has not started stressing me out yet. (haha, i have so much other stuff going on i kinda forget i am in school sometimes. right now school doesn't matter to me. i do it but i'm not thinking about it) ....BUT I DO HAVE A mid-quad exam this friday in one lit class, and another one on monday for my other lit class, then my first environmental sci test next friday!!
I was writing poems (or things that look like poems) in class today. I get obsessed with writing and just can't stop sometimes. Songs, poems.... it's good I guess but not when you forget you're in class and you can't concentrate on anything else! My head was somewhere in the clouds I guess.

Okay that's all for tonight. I am still "coping" and trying to understand and trying to survive. I keep listening to the same sad songs OVER AND OVER. Not sure if that's a good thing.......;-) Good night!

I can't say it better than this.

Missing You - Jem

I wish this could be
a happy song
But my happiness disappeared
the moment you were gone
Don't think I ever believed that
this day would come
Now all I'm feeling
is lost and numb

And ohhh I know I promised
Mmmm that I would try

But I, yes I, miss you
and it's killing inside

I'll always be thankful
for the time we had
We were blessed
I should celebrate
but I feel too sad
All the wonderful memories
just make me fall apart
And it feels like somebody's
stabbed me in my heart

And ohhh I know I promised
Mmmm that I wouldn't cry

But I, yes I, miss you
and it's killing inside
Ooh well I, yes I, miss you
want you by my side

Walking, holding hands
Talking, making plans
Touching my heart my soul

I wish this could be
a happy song
But my happiness disappeared
the moment you were gone
Tell me it's not happening
Say it's not as it seems
Tell me that I'm gonna wake up
It's just a bad dream
Please tell me that it's fiction
Tell me it's just a lie
Whatever you choose to tell me
Please say he didn't die

And I, yes I, miss you
and it's killing inside
Ooh well I, yes I, miss you
want you by my side
Ooh well I, miss you
want you by my side
Back here by my side
Here by my side

I need You

SO! Today I found out that I made Catacombs band!!! (Just when I thought all hope was lost....)
I am so thankful to God. I have been wanting to get back into worship leading since leaving Congo. I needed another place to be involved. Too much free time is very bad for me right now. You can probably figure out why.

If Ever - Damita

At this point in my life after all we've been through
I can't see myself living without you
For you to just walk away without having anything to say
It breaks my heart I cant make it through the day
If you ever really loved and everything you said is true
I need you to show me
I need you

Chorus:
If ever (if ever i needed)
I needed (if ever i needed)
You surely i do need you now (surely i need you now)
If ever (if ever i needed)
I needed (if ever i needed)
You surely i do need you now (surely i do need you now)

Just like I need the air to breathe
Just like the birds need the trees
I need You here to say you'll never leave
Just like the day needs the night
I need You as my guiding Light
You're all I need in my life
Cause with You I can do anything
Yes anything with You
I really need You
I need You

Are tears infinite?

Can't Stop the Rain
How, how am I supposed to feel
When everything surrounding me
Is nothing but a fake disguise
I don't know,
I don't know where I belong
It's time for me to carry on
I'll say goodbye

I can't stop the rain from fallin'
I'm drownin in these tears I cry
Since you left without a warning
I face the dawn with sleepless eyes
No I can't go on
When clouds are pushin' down on me, boy
I can't stop, I can't stop the rain
From fallin

So, tell me where I went wrong
I'm stuck inside a dream long gone
It's hard to reveal the truth
Your love,
Is nothing but a bitter taste
It's better if I walk away,
Away from you ....


Escaping Song
Men would die at sea for you
but all I want is you
men would live and die for you
but all I want is you.....you....oo

The beautiful moments we shared together
old and now
Don't make me drink this potion
I'll sleep forever
Until I wake under
the glacier ground
the ground,....the ground...the ground....oh yeah....


Hard to Say Goodbye
We didn't make forever.
We each got to go our seperate way,
And now we're standing here, helpless,
Looking for something to say.
We've been together a long time.
We never thought it would end.
We were always so close to each other;
You were always my friend.

And it's hard to say good-bye, my love.
Hard to see you cry, my love.
Hard to open up that door.
You're not sure what you're going for.


Breaking My Heart
Need to know
I don't wanna know
Already know
I've seen the signs
I watch you as you pull yourself away from me

Can't believe
I wanna believe
How can i believe
You're making me doubt
I thought i knew you
I don't even know myself

I'm losing faith
I'm losing all faith

You're breaking my heart
Breaking my heart
You're breaking my heart again
...

I wanna fight
Afraid to fight
Why don't i fight
And make you see
I hold my breath
And disappear inside myself

I'm losing strength, I'm losing all strength


Loving Arms
If you could see me now
The one who said that she'd rather roam
The one who said she'd rather be alone
If you could only see me now

If I could hold you now
Just for a moment, if I could really make you mine
Just for a while, turn back the hands of time
If I could only hold you now

Ive been too long in the wind
Too long in the rain
Taking any comfort that I can
Looking back and longing for
The freedom of my chains
And lying in your loving arms again

If you could hear me now
Singing somewhere through the lonely nights
Dreaming of the arms that held me tight
If you could only hear me now


Survivor.
I'm a survivor,
I'm not gonna give up,
I'm not gon' stop,
I'm gonna work harder,
I'm a survivor,
I'm gonna make it,
I will survive,
Keep on survivin'...


Something I came up with from *song titles* strung together:
this is my *Escaping Song.* So much for *My HAPPY Ending* in this *Heartbreak Town* or *Heartbreak Hotel.*
So, *Bring on the Rain* last night was *A Night to Remember...*
I had a *Bad Day,* and so many *Little Goodbyes* are *Breaking My Heart.* I only see* Tears and Rain.* All I want are those *Loving Arms...* and it's *Hard to Say Goodbye* to my *Almost Lover* but *Better Days* are coming for me and maybe you...what kind of *Sorta Fairytale* is this? Well the *Thunder Rolls* and the lightning strikes. But *Big Girls Don't Cry* (had to throw that last one in there for fun)

The bomb, it explodes.

Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength.

When I am weak, then I am strong. My God shall be my strength. He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Let him take hold of My strength.
Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you.

-From Daily Light, Sept. 10

What better verses from scripture could I read tonight than these?
I have cried my eyes red, my face blotchy, my voice sore, and my head is now aching. But God is my strength and He will sustain me.

I pray.

An Effort
Alack and woe, oh song: you're mocking me;
try as I may, I'll never be your red, red rose.
A rose is a rose is a rose. And you know it.

I worked to sprout leaves. I tried to take root.
I held my breath to speed things up, and waited
for the petals to enclose me.

Merciless song, you leave me with my lone,
nonconvertible, unmetamorphic body:
I'm one-time-only to the marrow of my bones.
-Wistawa Szymborska (pretty much my new favorite poet)

I pray some more.

What else can I do? Thank GOD for the friends He has provided me with this year.
They have and are helping me SO much!!!

I will trust in the Lord.


Something else I read today:
"God is the author of my call. He has the plan in mind, and I must respond to His nod. Take the thread of wanting to serve wherever He wants you and add it to the mix. The design will thrill you one day." -from the book The Grand Weaver

I pray I can and will do that.

GOODNIGHT.

photoshoot

This family I babysat for this summer are wedding photographers. THey also do senior portraits and 2 weeks ago thought it would be fun to take some pictures of me! We went walking through downtown Beverly, the beach, a park... and went crazy;-) ... No but we did take A LOT!! They wanted more "senior" pictures for their website and I was happy to help! I was very unsure how to model....but it was fun! Anyway if you'd like to see a sample of what they took, go to: www.sherrellportraitdesign.blogspot.com

I found out yesterday that I did NOT make it into Chapel worship band. :-(
I am still praying that I make it into Catacombs!

I am now officially in Gordon's dance ministry!

Gotta go...it's almost bedtime!

So,...now what? :-)

I went to the chiropractor today.
It's been great, I started going at the beginning of Aug. because I found out my insurance covers it! I have had a pinched nerve in my right shoulder for about 4 years so i finally got x-rayd everything to see if there is something bigger going on. Not that you need to know all this, but basically, i have lost most of the curve in my spinal part of my neck, and that has thrown everything off. So I've been going almost 3 times a week to this chiropractor and it has been really helping! Anywho, I rode my bike there today and I told him I had been swimming and was hoping to be on swim team or was at least considering it and seeing if i had time for it... .and he raised his eyebrows and looked very concerned and said: "Umm... I would definitely limit that right now."
And "limit" means going less than 3 times a week which is what I have to do right now to be able to be ready for swim team when it officially starts. We have 3x a week optional practices right now plus dry land training on the other 2 days....and I shouldn't be doing any of that I just found out. "Limit the arm over head exercises."
I have been praying so much that God would lead me and help me know where to get involved and how much time to put into different things. I am disappointed but at the same time, not at all, that I can't do swim team. It is kinda nice having a good real legit reason to not commit to the team. The chiropractor says I shouldn't! And if I can't be in the pool right NOW 3 times a week because he says my muscle is tryin to heal, i will never be able to catch up to the team and start swimming 6 days a week in October. I think I would ruin myself [shoulder].
So it looks like I've made my decision. Or God has. I can't swim. I'm physically not capable.
I really wanted to challenge myself and see if I could really do it. Balance my time between studies, swimming, work, friends, ministries, and alone/God time....but it looked impossible.... I was gonna try anyway.... But now God has shut that door.
I'm grateful in a way though. The pressure is off. I can commit to other things without worrying so much. I am definitely doing dance ministry now, and I am still praying that I got accepted into one of the 2 worship bands I auditioned for.

Well, I made 2 call-backs! And I've already been to the call-back auditions so now I have to sit and wait. and pray more.

I'm so excited for this year and what God has for me. It must not be swim team, so lead me God! I had a rough start with Orientation and other things in my life, but I am doing okay. I know that God has a plan, and I know He has His reasons for everything that's going on. He fills my loneliness, He takes away my sadness, He is there every minute of every day when other people can't be.
My joy is in Him. And I can trust that whatever happens, He worked it out that way and He just wants me to live for Him, live IN Him, live With Him.



the pictures you see are a few of my close friends (top left), my great roommate Emily on the right, and then me with Charlotte, my great suitemate (on right below the previous).

life begins again!

I'm back at Gordon!!
Actually, I've been here for a while. Half a month!
I moved in early to do Orientation staff stuff... so I had a week of training, then moved in freshmen, had my own "Crew" of freshies, and went into boston with them, met up with them lots, hung out,..... etc....
It was a lot. VERY crazy and I probably will never do that again! There's a lot more to say but I won't right now.

Classes started on the 27, and I'm doing 18 credits again. So far, I'm surviving okay. I am a little worried that I'm trying to do too much though. Besides classes, I will be starting up work again (for Deirdre, the high school consultant) on Tues./Thurs. mornings. I have chapel 3 mornings a week and I'm supposed to go to at least 2 of those 3.

I told Becky I'm gonna try to do dance ministry with her... it's basically dance team, but we do more ballet/lyrical/modern style dancing than the dance TEAM.

I am trying out SWIM TEAM until Oct. 6 (Oct. 6 is the day we have to COMMIT...give it a yes or no and start training 6 days/week!)... so for now I'm doing 3 days a week (with the team..."captain's practices") and 2 mornings a week (just with my roommate). It's pretty intense. I have no idea yet if i'll actually be able to or want to do it when it actually starts up for real.

Tonight I had my first audition for Catacombs band. Catacombs is a Sunday night worship service, and ever since last year I've been wanting to be up on stage singing with them.... last year I only made call-backs, so I'm hoping for better this time around! If i get IN, they practice one day in the week and 2 hours on sunday before performing.

Tomorrow night I audition for CHAPEL WORSHIP band! If I don't get into Catacombs I really wanna do this, so I'm hoping for the best. I don't really know which one is better for me or if I am supposed to even do either one. But I'm praying a lot about all this.... all these opportunities,... and trying to not commit to TOO much! I do have lots of homework obviously these days.

I think if I get into one of the worship bands then I will say no to Gospel Choir this semester even though it was really fun. The thing is that it fell apart 2nd semester and barely existed. Gospel choir basically consisted of me and my 2 best friends. We were the only ones dedicated enough for it. This year apparently they had 30 sign up, and they emailed me to ask me to come back. I guess if I don't get into one of the bands I will do it. It isn't THAT big of a time commitment and it's fun as long as lots of people are in it and serious about it!

I have no idea how I'll do all this, but God is strong and so far it sort of looks like everything will work out. Will I have a life? No..... will i ever have free time?? Probably not. :-) We will see how this goes.

The audition tonight I felt like went awesome.... so I'm hoping tomorrow night goes the same!

I'm excited about my classes this semester/quarter.... I have Journalism I, Public Speaking, Nobel Lit: Poetry and Drama, Western Lit: Homer-Shakespeare, Sociology (doesn't start til 2nd quarter), and Environmental Science (the only one i'm not liking at all). Pretty intense schedule but once this quarter is done, both of my lit classes will be finished!!!

By the way-- the big news is that my family found a place in Pasadena, CA and are living there while they're on furlough!! I'm so happy for them and so excited to get to visit at Christmas!!

OKAY-I need to run to bed but I just thought I should update a little!

get this going

My summer is slowly starting to kick off. I've been here for 5 nights (tonight'll be the 6th) and have been very lazy at night, but what else can i do?
I wish I could see people...I am in need of some socializing.

Okay so it is a big bummer. Verizon doesn't work well at this house at all. I feel like I'm in the Congo! I have to skype, aim, or text people to be able to talk! But that's okay... i need to be grateful for where I get to stay! I should take pictures of this place. It's unbelievable. And when it warms up enough to SWIM, it'll be even more amazing!! After I work, I come upstairs and either check my email and talk to my sister in Congo, or go out on the bike... yesterday I ran to singing beach and read there for a bit then came back. It was sooo nice! On Monday I rode my bike to some shops and bought some stuff I needed/wanted. It was a LONG bike ride-- i probably did 12 miles in all because I took a few wrong turns or missed a turn or something!! Oh well, it was such a nice day! My great aunt normally eats around 7 here, so I have time to shower or read or do whatever before that, and then after dinner it's usually LOST or a movie, .... talking to people online... etc.! Last night though, I PAINTED! Yeah, a 12 year old probably could've done a better job at the picture I painted, but that's ok... I enjoyed it, and it relaxed me a LOT!!!

I started working (doing yardwork) at my great aunt's on monday, and it's been really good. I so much prefer the yardwork in the sun to the cleaning inside that I normally do here! I'm so tired today.... i got enough sleep but I worked from 9:30-4... So I guess it makes sense!

Last Friday was soooo fun. Connie (she lives on my aunt's property and has been such a blessing to me this year) took me and Becky into Boston for dinner and to see the Boston Ballet. She dropped us off at this AMAZING Indian restaurant (best in New England i think) and we went to the ballet by ourselves. The food was SOOOO good, and the ballet was so cool because we sat IN THE SECOND ROW!!!!!! Right behind the orchestra!!!! When the music stopped playing, we could hear the dancers breathing, we were that close! ;-) Crazy... becky and i ate it up!! My second cousin gave us the tickets because she has season tickets.

The next day I went to Maine with Becky, Andy, and Frank. We went to Andy's house and did a lot of hanging out-playing frisbee, eating, beaching, a little sight-seeing... Frank and Andy grilled burgers for us, and they were so good!! It was a nice weekend -- we went to Singing Beach on Sunday, too, and played more frisbee, and got Captn. Dusties ice cream!!!! :-) delish.
This weekend I am going up to Gale Cottage (in New Hampshire I think?) which is a little cabin that's been in my family for years. We'll probably be doing lots of hiking and outdoorsy stuff, and just hanging out. I'm excited! It'll be a nice little getaway with some of my second cousins and second cousins once removed, and maybe my great aunt if she's up for it.
I'm gonna run to dinner now! Can't keep anyone waiting in this Howard house!! :-)

I woke up and realized I'm a sophomore? Am i still dreaming?

I just finished my freshman year of college! What in the world?!!! This feels a little too much like a dream. I can't believe I just said my goodbyes to my "new" friends until August!
Yesterday was a day of packing and moving out, oh and one last exam that i think i did pretty well on,... and today was a day of helping my friends move out!
My summer plans are to live at my great aunt's (starting tonight--i'm there now) which is 4 miles down the road from my school, and to work as much as i can in as many different places, for as many different people as i can! Oh... and there's this trip coming up that i'm SO excited for.... I'M GOING TO CHICAGO AND CALIFORNIA!!! :-) YAY!!!
June 6 I leave here and go see my sister in Chic. for 4 days, and then we're flying together with my neice and nephew as well, to San Luis Obispo, CA to be with the Cabalkas (also known as my boyfriends' family who i love and adore)!! .... for 2 weeks!
On the 24 of June I'm back in MA, working some more at various people's places, hopefully lots of babysitting, but for sure some office work. I have a new job starting next week as this woman's "Personal office assistant." Doesn't that sound so professional?? Well, I think so, and I'm excited! I met my "employer" on Monday, and we drove up the hill to her house which is right up the road from where i'll be living all summer, so it is super convenient for me to walk or ride my bike! It just couldn't be more perfect. She lives in a HUGE house on a hill, so the office has a GREAT ocean view. It's GoRgeous, and i'm so stoked for it.

I have to be back at school on Aug. 17 for Orientation staff training (yes, i made it on staff!!) and moving in. I'm so excited about next year! For many reasons, but a big one is the new roommate, and the same amazing suitemates in the same great dorm. It's gonna be too much fun!! And getting to "orient" freshmen for next year? What could be better?! ;-) we'll see....


It's been so long since I've written, and so much has happened. I don't really know how I go so long without writing. Oh wait, yes i do... it's called college and being lazy and writing in a real journal instead, and... YEAH... so LIFE.
I still love Gordon. Even after 2 semesters. Finals were INTENSE even though i only had 2 exams...my hardest class this year was New Testament, and you'd think since I'm a missionary kid AND a pastor's kid, it would've been easy as pie or maybe they would've let me pass out of it? UM NO. Not so much. I can't really say WHY it was so durn hard, but it was. Let me put it this way. I studied for a week and a half straight and got a D on the 2nd exam. I studied for at least 5 days straight and got a B for the last final which is supposed to be "easy." I will be very thankful to get a C overall in that class. It just was really in depth and hard. I can't believe i'm just publicizing my grades. But obviously i don't care! My favorite class was Principles of Design, a communications class that was only mon. nights for 3 hours. The time passed quickly though because we usually had stuff to paint and work on, and hardly ever had to do any homework! My "final" for that class was just a portfolio of everything we had done, and he told me I did "very good work during the semester and a very strong presentation" ...so that made me smile.

My favorite part of the year? Well, my FAVORITE part would definitely be Feb. 19:-), and you who know me know why, but at school... or my favorite part about school? I guess just all my new friends. There have been ups and downs with certain people, but overall it was FANTASTIC and i am so excited for more memories and more fun and more friends next year!!!!!

I got to go to the Dominican Republic for my spring break this year with Gordon, and it was SO GREAT. It was a missions trip -- we had 21 people on the team, and everyone was so fun! We had a blast and God worked everything out financially for me to go. I got more than enough support and I made quite a few great friends there. It was hard to leave after being there for 9 days and spending time with adorable kids (we did some VBS) and getting to know the workers (we did a lot of construction on a church and school)....so i would totally want to do it again! My first short term missions trip: AMAZING!

Gordon's hard but it's so worth it and it can be really fun... and boring too.... it is a small school so you have to have some downtime, but that can be good every now and then!! I didn't get to go into Boston half as many times as I wanted or as I thought I would, but it is hard finding transportation around here and finding the time to spend a whole day or long night in the city. Well, tomorrow I am actually going into Boston for the night to see the Boston Ballet with my friend Becky, so i am SUPER excited about that, and I think we'll make a night of it and go somewhere to get dinner too!! :-) I haven't been to a ballet in AGES and ... the boston ballet?? SOO good!
That sums up my life kinda. kinda. kinda. I have been putting LOTS of pictures on my facebook this year, so check there if you haven't already.
I thought I'd try to go to bed early tonight, but it looks like that attempt just failed. It's 12:15 and I'm working at my great aunt's at 11 tomorrow, and then a big night...so Goodnight!

thinking...

I woke up this morning at 7:45 and went running with my sister Christiana! I don't know where running has been all my life, but it really clears the head. It's not AS enjoyable as night-walks, but it was good nonetheless! And running with someone is so much easier than doing it alone. Time passes more quickly and I don't think I get tired as easily with someone beside me:-)
It has been so great having my sister Christiana here and spending time with her. I feel like I never really "got to know her" that well growing up. If that's possible. I don't know, just didn't feel as close to her.... maybe it's that we were pretty different from each other. I was always the "quiet one" in the house, and she was more talkative and dramatic. Of course I have always loved her, but now I'm getting to know her better, and it is a lot of fun! We went to the pool the other day, just me and her, ... I brought along a book, but I never picked it up. She and I just talked, and it was a great time!
Lately I have felt pretty unproductive, and felt like life is on hold for me,...that time just froze as soon as I got to Congo (because you really feel like you are on another planet over here)... but ... I am seeing that this isn't all true. I am spending a LOT of time only with my family, and I am so thankful for it.
I exercise a lot out of lack of better things to do.... watch a lot of ALIAS (i'm on season 4 and have one more season to go before i can leave here! haha),... sit and read, play tennis, take walks, play pingpong, and spend a lot of time at the pool. Yes, I'm getting a tan!

My favorite new thing is to take night-walks. Like I mentioned before.... walks by myself late as night. The later, the more interesting, I think. One really good memory I have of my first authentic night-walk was with Zaq, one of the last nights I was in the States before moving to France and beginning my life of adventures! We had just finished a movie, and I think we started taking a walk at 3am. He lives in a big neighborhood, so it was pretty weird walking down streets lined with dark houses.... you feel like everyone is asleep in the world except for you- and the person walking with you of course. Zaq and I have been best friends for so long, so this walk was really awesome. We had a lot of times of silence because neither of us knew what to really say. I was leaving for France and Congo! Didn't know how long I'd be gone... there wasn't really very much we COULD say.... but it was still awesome just walking and talking or sharing the silence. We went to the little neighborhood park and sat on the picnic bench. Sprinklers were going off all around us. We sat on that picnic bench for I don't know how long, but there again was a little more of that silence. And i cant remember it being awkward. It was 3am, and we were in this park. haha! Funny to look back on, but such a memory. It's always stuck with me but I never got very serious about trying to take a walk at night by myself recently. Sometimes I do it at college, but I have my phone with me... so it's quite different! Zaq tells me it's kinda like therapy for him to go walking at night by himself. Well, last week or something I decided to go out at 10pm. Yeah, not quite 3am, but it was dark, nonetheless!
The American School's campus has 2 soccer fields (1 is like a smaller practice field down nearer to our house), a tennis court, basketball court, pool, lots of houses for teachers and some missionaries (like us).... so much/ it's quite a big campus. The disappointing part of this walk was remembering how they leave lights on everywhere... the tennis court had lights, the basketball court had lights... i'll explain that later. So the stars were out all big and bright. Couldn't see the moon, but it was a very clear night! I first went to the small elem. soccer field and lay down in the middle of it, so i could stare up at the stars. I just lay there for a few minutes and thought. I thought of places I should walk to, and things i needed to think about. I walked to the elementary playground where there are swings. I love swings..... and I have a happy memory there, so I swung for a while and just remembered and thought some more. The more places I walked, the more memories I remembered. It made me miss certain things and certain people. ...I made my way up to the bigger soccer field and went to the middle of that one and lay down. The lights from houses and the court were pretty annoying. Bright, flourescent. ANd then I started hearing lots of cars. I tried to drown out the light and noise so I could just lie there and talk to God and listen to the bugs... I don't know how long I lay there because I didn't bring a clock. I wanted to just forget time and stay out as long as I felt I needed to. After a while I walked to another place and climbed a tree. Then I kinda felt weird because I could look over the wall that is around the whole campus and I could see the chaotic street. Climbed down and decided to go back to the first soccer field where it was quieter and there are only a few lights from the tennis courts there. I sat down on the edge of the field under some bamboo trees and palms. I didn't care how dirty i was probably getting. I just sat there and remembered. And thought of the future. And even cried a little. It made me feel lonely, but at the same time, in my loneliness, I could sense God was right there, and I knew He was reaching out to me and hearing my cry. He knew what that cry was all about and He knew how everything would work out for me. He knows how everything is still going to work out. Looking up at the stars always makes me feel so small, so insignificant, but it reminds me of the kind of God I serve and long to worship. He sees each one of us. Cares for every one of us. Loves us each unconditionally. "There is nothing we can do that will make Him love us less." I love that. I heard that in a video we watched at youth group this Sunday. It's easy to forget. But that's the kind of Father we have!

Tonight I took another walk, and it wasn't AS amazing... and it wasn't an hour long like my first, but it was definitely worth it. I saw a snail as big as a cell phone making a trail through the sand, I watched the clouds cover and uncover the half-moon, I gazed at the stars again...the beautiful stars. I swung on those swings again. I'm thankful I decided to do that! Tonight I had a towel with me so I could lie on the grass without itching like mad because of the weird grass bugs or maybe it's the grass itself... anyway! i was lying on the towel, and a guard approached me. Side note -- this school has a bunch of guards -- people who stay at the gate, and also people posted all over the campus who patrol around just to make sure everything is safe. They have walkie-talkies,.... and i guess they are supposed to make me feel secure, but whenever you forget something at the pool or even at the basketball court, you can be pretty sure that it will not be there when you come back. We think lots of these guards or workers steal. Now I'm not one to judge, but someone is doing a lot of stealing. Just ask me how many things I have lost here... of course it's always my fault... but it's just sad. All that to say, I don't trust the guards COMPLETELY. Anyhow, I saw one coming towards me and he spoke to me in French. Asked me if I was doing GYMNASTICS?!!! Maybe he thought my towel was more like an exercise pad? I have no idea but i was definitely not moving in a gymnastic way. :-) It was hilarious ... so I told him no... i was merely on a walk and was looking at the stars and sky! He was good with that answer, but asked my name and when he walked off I heard him say "it's Eva Shepard." So now I will always be known as that queer one who does gymnastics in the middle of the soccer field. All by myself! Hahahahaha...and What must they think when they see me Swinging by myself?! At night! I guess I must look VERY odd. And maybe they think I just have no friends and no life.....which is pretty much true----JUST KIDDING! :-p

I got inspired the other day and pulled out the guitar so I could write a song. I don't get those inspired moods too often so it was exciting to sit down and really finish a song! Now it doesn't sound so good, but just the fact that I wrote something ... yeah I was pretty happy with that. I hope I'll get in a mood like that again and write something decent. Worth showing people. hmm... will that EVER happen? Worth showing someone?! haha! We will see. Right now life is so happy. And i think that's why I had an "inspiring moment." lol
Wow, it's now midnight, so ...seems like a fine time to head off to bed or something. I find it hilarious how much I write here and never get any comments. Well, I don't know what would comment on. If there is a who reads this. It would be cool if no one read this, maybe. Well, either way.... whether someone reads or not, I'm happy I got all this out of me. Feels good.
Not sure if I got EVERYTHING out --Nnnnope! i definitely didn't. I'll save that for another one.

More pictures from christmas break

Photobucket Album

A New Album full of Pics

Photobucket Album

Holidays and such in Congo...

This Christmas Eve and Christmas we broke a few traditions! First of all, Christmas Eve, we didn't get to have a candlelight service at Church. That was pretty disappointing to all of us, but my dad couldn't get the committee to let him have a service:-( Apparently not many people wanted to have a service. We had our traditional potato leek soup (yay!) for dinner, and rolls...:-) YUM! Then we all sat around and ate some homemade ice cream and each opened one gift (that's one of our old traditions). Sometimes we try to open the smallest looking gift on Christmas Eve so we can save the bigger ones for C. Day! ;-) This year the power went off before dinner was ready... but only for like 2 minutes, thankfully!!

In the morning we gathered in our pjs in the living room to open our stocking. Mom and Dad came out in their matching Congolese shirts and served us some juice! We watched (and videod) dad opening his stocking because he always has the funniest reactions and is always excited about no matter what is put in his stocking.... and then we all opened ours at the same time. How we usually do it. Breakfast followed, and we enjoyed homemade EGG NOG (thanks to Sarah!), and sweet rolls (another tradition broken-- normally we have baked apples, but this is Congo). Dad was eating a hard boiled egg and was getting quite frustrated trying to crack it open! He's always funny trying to do his eggs. After breakfast, we opened gifts... and this time mom said we wouldn't try to open in order of age. We would just open one at a time, whatever random order we wanted! But we still pretty much took turns. We don't like opening all of them all at once because it's fun to watch people's reactions. Especially when people are opening a gift you gave! All the stuff my family gave me was really neat, and probably my favorite gift i got was from my mom -- She bought some zebra print material and took it to a purse shop where they made it into a messenger bag for me!! And a matching one for Colleen-- they're fun! Very African :-)
I gave my mom some homemade stationery--like thank-you cards-- and she loved them, but while we were passing them around (after we had just said that they were from when me & my sisters made cards at thanksgiving), my dad saw them and goes "Oh, we're these made by some handicaps?" ahahahaha! We had a good long laugh about that....:-) We decided to have our christmas dinner later, like at 7pm because at 2:00 we were invited to a Christmas caroling slash christmas cookie get together at the #2guy's house in the US Embassy. He and his wife were really friendly, and we sang all the Christmas carols we knew around the piano! It was pretty fun -- then we had cheese and crackers, cookies, cakes.... drinks.... then at home we had to get the food altogether and ate finally a while later. Surprisingly our African turkey was some of the best turkey ever, and although the sweet potatoes i made were a lot dryer than normal, we had most of the same foods we normally have every Christmas.

Christmas flew by and soon it was New Years. On New Years Eve, Theo went to the youth group party to show some support and represent us, and Christiana went out with a few singles. The rest of us went to Elaeis for dinner. I had a tasty Hawaiian chicken salad... but why am I talking about all these details? Not really the point. Yet. We all had good dinners and then headed to this restaurant called Chateau Margot which is known for their amazing desserts. They were booked for a party, but they said "If you don't mind being all by yourselves, we have a private room inside you can eat in!" .... did we mind? NOT AT ALL! So we Took the chance and were shown to this room with a big table and big, nice leather chairs.... pretty blue walls, a few big paintings,...and AC (always a big plus) .... Our server was SUCH a sweet lady. Very polite, you didn't feel awkward while she was in the room because she didn't stare at us... and she was very formal and you knew she had been trained well. We ordered a few coffees, and they came in teeny cups on their own indiv. trays with a very small cake beside. Then we ordered our desserts-- me and mom got Creme Brulee, Dad got some creme filled pastries with ice cream and chocolate sauce, and sarah & colleen got Mousse au Chocolat. They came beautifully displayed.... presentation was gorgeous! ANd they tasted even better than they looked. if that's possible. haha! DELISH.
We got home around 9:30...then watched some Alias, paused it at midnight, broke open some sparkling cider and toasted! Sarah did a little dance... then we went back to Alias, and then bed!
New Years Day we had this Congolese guy pick us up with a mini van to take us to thie place called Gandayala, a picnic spot on a river that flows into/out of (?) the Congo River. The van we squished in smelled of fish because it had been used to transport some people who must have been carrying fish!! Ew... but anyway, about 1.5hrs later we got to the spot and realized my friend Chaima was behind us with her family! WHat a coincidence -- she was picnic-ing there too! ... We planned on staying the night there because my dad thought he had reserved the cabin for the night. When we looked at the cabin, there were only 2 bedrooms, and including the 2 couches downstairs, only 5 beds (just one was a double bed). We had been promised enough for 7 people and it was supposed to cost $50. The guy there wanted $100, and he didn't even have our reservation!! We were fed up, and decided it probably wasn't worth the money so we'd just picnic and have a boat ride! I hung out with Chaima til she had to eat lunch, and then we ordered food from the restaurant. Plantains, chicken, shish-ka-bobs, fries... expensive, but not bad! Then we went on the motor boat -- only our family. It was so neat!! Took a 30min cruise upstream, they let us get out and swim, then we went back.... it was so relaxing and fun! -- And quite beautiful!! And we could actually took pictures, which was GREAT! After the boat ride, we just hung out on the shore and grass, waiting for our ride to come back which wasn't coming til 6... so we had 3 hours. We took naps, played cards, and just talked and it was fun! Very relaxing as i said about the boat...the whole thing was relaxing. Even though there were some pesty people who wanted to sell us wicker furniture or charge us to take a picture of the baby crocodile they were carrying around.... or to play guitar & sing (even though we kept saying PLEASE GO AWAY!!) and get some money from us. That part was just kinda funny! Oh Congo.
On the way home, we sung songs from Disney movies and other musical the whole way back! it was probably pretty annoying for our driver, but great fun for us! What a good New Years Day!! Not much comes close to beating good family time. I loooove my family!!

moving along

First semester done and gone! Wow, that was extreeeeemely fast. I don't think time has ever passed faster! Except maybe when i lived in france... but that's obvious b/c FR was just too amazing. This semester was awesome. I feel like I have pretty much gotten used to college and as long as I work ahead, I'll do great! The past 2 weeks somehow I got ahead in H/w so when exam time came (and i only had 2 written ones), I was pretty free to hang around and didn't stress AT ALL! My 2 written exams were in French (surprisingly not too hard) and Old Testament (also not bad!) .. then i had like 3 papers due for my other 3 classes. --And those were short, easy papers I wrote ahead, so it really was easy when exam time came! I felt bad for those people who had like 4 exams and couldn't start studying because they had papers to write or things to read etc... i think next semester will be much harder with western civ. (history), NEW testament (and i have one of the hardest teachers apparently), Psychology, and Comm., and then the freshmen required class again called "Christianity, Character, & Culture." ...but hopefully it won't be TOO bad for me! I won't have any classes on Tuesdays and only one at 8am on thursdays!!!! pretty stoked about that-- but those will have to be my work days since MWF are gonna be pretty jam-packed.
What keeps me going is having some AWESOME friends, near and far! I just love Gordon. It snowed a lot before I came here and we went sledding on cafeteria trays! It's just fun .... even though it gets cold, you stay inside or bundle up a lot and drink lots of hot chocolate or lattes.... it's lovely!

So I am in Kin now!! Back in Congo...."Home." it was funny telling people I was "just going to Africa" for winter break. And there's a song by Kenny Chesney called "All I Want for Christmas is a Real Good Tan" ... i think i may just get that while i'm here! Planning on doing LOTS of swimming and tennis;-) My flight here was very interesting .... probably one of the worst flights I've ever taken -- it was so long and draining. Surprisingly, I'm not at all jet-lagged, I think I got enough sleep on the plane.
Alrighty, here goes a long detailed story about my flight, whether you wanted it or not!
On Friday morning, I went to the airport at 3:30 am -- my friend Corrie drove me because she lives 20 mins away from the airport, and I had gone to stay at her house on Wed. after my last exam.

So we got to the airport at 4:00 and didn't expect anyone to be there, but ... we were wrong. In the intl. flight line, there were like 30 ppl in front of me and more and more (Mostly Asians, lol) kept coming in. i waited for 45 mins in line, and then went through SECURITY, which was even worse, 30mins waiting time... so then by the time I got to my gate I only had to wait like 5mins before boarding. I flew to Wash. DC, and slept nearly the whole time... At the DC airport, my flight was leaving at 9:30 and I got to the gate at like 8:45 ... I checked in and the people said that Christiana (my sister meeting me) hadn't checked in yet..that was weird because her flight from Nashville was coming in at 11pm on Thursday night ... so she was supposed to be there the night before.... kinda worried me. WHERE COULD SHE BE? So I went and got a little Starbucks -- muffin & cocoa because it would be the last time to do that for a month... haha i'm pathetic. When I got back to the gate, there was my sister, thank goodness!!!! So then I sat down with her, ready for story time. haha
Her flight had been cancelled to DC last night, and the only way to get up to DC was to take a flight to Baltimore (she had to buy a new ticket), and then these people our uncle knew picked her up and drove her in the morning to the airport in DC. It was a messy, long, involved story, so I won't get into all of it, but she was quite flustered!! Her luggage had also broken open on the way from Nashville to Baltimore so she had to go to walmart and buy a new trunk!! it was just crazy. But we met up and got on our flight to Ethiopia. Christiana had a really big rolling "carry-on" so we pushed as hard as we could to squeeze it into the overhead bin... buuuuut we couldn't do it, even with a guy's help. So i told her to just check it below. Right after the flight I was thinking that they would put it on the ramp that goes into the airport right outside the plane so we could get it in Ethiopia and get on our flight to Kinshasa. I didn't think about the fact that we were on Ethiopian airlines and they might check it and you would have to pick it up in baggage claim in Ethiopia!!! ... Anywho, wasn't worried about that at the time. SO we boarded and we didnt have seats together but my seat was in the very front of economy so i was like, "well whoever's sitting with you won't mind switching and going to sit where i'm supposed to sit b/c it's closer to the front!" Or so i thought. I sat down by Christiana and when the guy who had that seat came, i told him the deal and he was like, "well let me go check it out." he came back and said that someone was sitting in my seat, so he made me move. I went back up front and the flight attendant asked me if i minded sitting in the middle exit row (this was a big plane -- 3 rows across) ... i was like "of course not!! yay for leg room!!" and settled in. -- In between a lady in her upper 40's and an Ethiopian, also middle aged. The Ethiopian couldn't keep still and kept getting out of her seat and talking to flight attendants in her language... which was fine but this cute girl that was sitting behind us who was friends with the Ethiopian kept coming up and sitting by me. While i was watching the movie she kept wanting me to change the channel or find it on her tv (we had our own little screens) and kept turning up my volume til it was making my ears bleed. lol ... she was adorable, but loud behind me! and whenever i tried to lie my seat back she would go "HEY -- I'm not going to sleep! Move your chair!" but i got away with it for a little bit at least.... I slept a while, watched movies for a while, slept,... read a tiny bit, just did anything i could to pass time. Longest flight of my life. We stopped over in Rome after 8 hrs to refuel and i was so bummed they wouldn't let us off the plane. We had to sit there for like 2 hrs, saw some Italian trash guys get on the plane to collect trash, and heard them speaking some italian....:-) i had to pretty much stay in my seat the whole time. miserable. We were served 3 or 4 meals and they were just horrible. worst airplane food ever. it was like fake, and made me feel sick so i didn't want to eat anything. My stomach kept hurting on and off, and the food they kept bringing out was disgusting. Finally we got off the ground again and flew for 7 or 8 more hours to Ethiopia. I tried to sleep a lot, and watched another movie, but the only good movie was No Reservations which i loved!
Finally we got to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. It looked exactly like the Kenyan airport -- looked pretty new, but very empty and big. The first thing i realized was our flight was an hour late so we had 10 mins before our flight to Kin was supposed board!!! I got out of the plane and waited for C. Then i realized we had to find her bag because it wasn't sitting on the "gangplank" outside the plane! oh noes!! It was going to baggage claim! So as soon as C got outta the plane, we ran down to baggage claim, which was on the OTHER side of customs. What were we going to do? we didn't need to go to customs b/c we weren't staying-plus there was a long line!! We talked to a guy who worked there and were like "we need to get a bag and get on a connecting flight but we shouldn't have to go through customs!" he tried to be helpful and was like "Oh, fine! Just pass through!" Just pass through? Does that mean go through the line and talk to the customs officials or... just "pass through" like in between the counters and just run through and ignore the ppl in line and behind the counter? wouldn't we get stopped?? WELL ... We ran for it because we had a flight to catch!!

... Got to the baggage claim carousel and no bags were out yet (obviously ... u know how long it normally takes... and we were in AFRICA!) .. i was like "umm... C??? what are we gonna do??? We have to find someone and tell them to just send our bag onto Kin>" and she was like "yahhh ... oh noooo i'm sooo sorrrry!!" i was like "no it's not your fault but we better hurry! our plane leaves in 5mins!!!!!!" it actually was going to leave in like 5. We were so scared. i didn't want to spend a night in E!... we found some ppl standing around and they were NO HELP at all. I prayed for an angel. I didn't know what else we could do. Right then someone paged us in french. "Madames Evangeline et Christiana...ajfkjakjdfka jfkjakfj akfj ajfkd jakdjf kajkd fjakl. Merci." they repeated it 3 or 4 times! I found her (she had run off to find an "info desk" or something ... but there was nothing ANYwhere...) and was like "that's us!! we just have to run!!" and she was like "What?? they did?" i don't know how she hadn't heard our names .. i heard them clear as day. but yeah so we ran upstairs and saw a sign that said "Connecting flights" (thank God for english!) and a man was looking at us (there were only 3 ppl in sight... it was really deserted), Pointing to these 2 other guys who were like "this way!!" and they looked like we should be in a hurry. So we rushed over and followed the people's pointing... got to a security line and we started walking through without putting our bags down. Of course they stopped us cuz our bags had to be x-rayed... then this lady showed up and was like "Are you Evangeline and Christiana? Follow me!" and she was walking really fast, we rushed and told her about our bag and gave her the claim ticket which she took and said she would tell someone and figure it out. So we got on the plane... i think we were the last ones on. We sat on rows across from each other, so that was nice. 5mins later the lady that saved our life came back and handed us the bag ticket and said it had been checked on to congo! So, sighs of relief... then the plane door closed and we just sat there. For what seemed like 3 hours.. but i think it was just 1. I'm not sure what we were waiting for! THey never explained. I sat next to 2 Congolese girls who loved talking and bumping me. while i was sleeping the girl poked me and made me get up so she could get to the bathroom, but other than that it was okay. it seemed like a really long flight but i think it was 4hrs. I watched a bit of Home Alone -- In FRENCH b/c they didn't have it in eng. (it was hilarious!)... and some Everybody loves Ray, which was really dumb. tried sleeping .. they served another awful meal. i still felt pretty miserable. i think i ate 4 bites and threw it out.

The flight attendants were the worst. Really bad service. Even on the flight from DC to ethiopia they seemed in a big hurry to serve the food and give you drinks. Even if you were asleep they would nudge you and rip out your tray so they could throw food at you. And you know when you have to put your seat back upright when you're landing? I saw a congolese man with his head covered in a blanket and he had his seatback, so a flight attendant came to him and ripped the blanket off his head, pushed the botton, and jerked his seat forward while she shouted "put your seats up!" ... it was hilarious but also pretty sad. Such a different culture I guess. They were all Africans... very different! :-) well... we finally landed in Kin.

We got through customs fine, -- didn't have to wait very long -- they didn't even bother asking for our invitation letters ... well on the other side of Customs, I didn't see our protocol man right away, and i was like "well he'll find me... dad told me his name..." so when a guy standing there saw me and asked who was picking me up i said "Mukila Paul" (pretty confidently). And the guy nodded and told this woman to call him! She had his number.... i was like "Oh good yeah this is def the one guy dad wanted to pick us up because everyone knows our protocol man!" well the lady showed me and C a place to sit down away from the chaos and called Paul. She let him talk to me and i was like "i am walt shepard's daughter ... u know him ? ... well i am at the airport..." struggling finding words in french to say to him! and he's like "oui oui, I am coming!" in english. So i was like "YAY ... he knows me he's the guy!" because i was a little nervous i had said the wrong name. My dad had emailed me on wed and told me his name, and i had wrote a note in my phone -- so i looked at my phone. The name was "Papa Maninga." Totally different, but i was thinking ... "hmm ... congolese do have lots of names. it must be the same guy!" so i asked the lady for her phone to call dad. She seemed like a very nice lady and willingly let me use her phone. Dad was like "nooooooooo!!! maninga! i told u in the email!" so i told the lady to quickly call him back and tell him not to come. Right then before i hung up with my dad, Maninga looked at me and smiled. I was like Oh noooooooo.....slash, "so good to see you!!" but i was like "WHAT HAVE I DONE????? poor paul is coming" P.Maninga told me to sit down again and we gave him our baggage claim tickets. we sat for a LONG time just waiting for the carousel to start turning and sending out our luggage. When they started, i went over and stood with M to look for our bags. After a LOOOONG wait, i finally found my 2 bags and one of christiana's ... then finally another one of C's came out, but then we waited and waited and the last bag came out, and it was NOT C's carry on that we had had trouble with in Ethiopia. So we took the bags we had out to the car, and while we walked to M's truck, the lady that let me borrow her phone came up to us and Papa said that she claimed i owed her $5 for a new phone card b/c i used her phone. I go "but i used it for one minute!!" and he goes "tell her thati n french>" so i did, and she widened her eyes in disbelief. Another woman out of no where was like "Une minute??" also in disbelief. I go "OUI!!!" and she imitated me "OUI!!" in an awful voice. Good grief woman!! i didn't give her money... and wasn't about to! but i think Maninga had to give her a few francs to get her to leave us away. She started banging on my window. I wasn't tired until we had landed in Kin. The chaos of the airport was SOOOO bad.... i was sweating so much and getting pushed around a lot. And had made such a dumb mistake. Mukila Paul did show up at the airport, found me, and shook my hand and i had to apologize to him. He talked to Maninga and was wanting an explanation why he wasn't taking me (in the past he had taken dad and my sister to the airport and stuff a while ago) ... maninga explained to him and paul was like "what's walt's number??" so he called my dad! ah i was so embarrassed. he came all the way to the airport for nothing! and then my dad was a little distressed about it..
but urgh . . .. so then we drove home, and it was the longest ride of my life. For half the time Maninga was trying to give us a tour guide in english since C had never been here. .. .but then C fell asleep so then it was me & him and he kept getting phone calls . . . and i didn't feel like talking. there was SO much traffic! i think we got home around 4 after landing at 1. So maybe i exaggerated how long everything took but i really do feel like it was the longest day of my life. So yeah that made it SOOOO GREAT to finally get home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ran inside and hugged everyone. Surprised i didn't melt down and cry. what a wonderful 2 days!
Moral of this story or lesson to be learned?? Don't fly Ethiopian AA if you can help it!!!
But mannn... is it good to be HOME!!! We haven't heard anything about C's luggage but... I've talked to lots of people who recently flew in here and they all lost their luggage but got it back in 2 days. So maybe we will too -- i think it's just because it's christmas. And being Africa might have a little to do with it as well! hehe...
I swam some laps today & ran a teeny bit... I plan on trying to do that every morning at 9. It feels so odd being back here... but it's a GOOD odd. I don't feel like I ever left because so much is the same! We live in a different house -- my parents have a place on the American School campus now, and though it's much smaller than our old house, it's in a more convenient area -- good community, better electricity (meaning it goes off less) and water, etc... and i think it might be cheaper or the same price. Plus, what could be better than having a big pool w/ 2 diving boards and a volleyball & tennis court plus a running path all around you?

SO -- merry Christmas, one and ALL ... I hope you have a GREAT Christmas and NEW YEARS! Happy Holidays, love you all!! Time to hang out with my family again!:-p

hearts

Exaaams are coming. I'm not really ready but thankfully, I only really have 2 finals and then a few final papers!
But with exams coming, that only means Christmas is coming, and lucky me gets to go to Congo for a whole MONTH! God is so awesome. He worked it out so well! I'm realllllly excited to see my fambly again!
This weekend I decided to get off campus and stay 2 nights at my great aunt's house (her place is like 4 mi from campus). I just needed to GET AWAY from it all. There's too much going on at school so it's way too easy to get distracted. Plus, I can never study in my room because my roommate is in there often and my bed is REALLY tempting ... and so is the internet! Yeah so anyway I got away yesterday and last night i was able to write 2 short essays in 2 hours! They were just rough drafts, but it's such a relieving feeling being done with papers for this whole week. Of course I'll have to write the final drafts Next week, but it's a big accomplishment for me;-) I can concentrate so much easier here. I did all my Old Test. assignments for Thursday, and my comm. assignment for tomorrow... i planned on working on french tonight, but found my aunt's giant tv MUCH more interesting.
This week was just extremely hard and stressful so it's good to get away and take a long bath in a jet tub, make chocolate chip cookies, and sit down and watch a movie or 2. This is what I've done the past 2 nights! A few things outside of school have been bugging me and making me even more stressed out. I'm very thankful for these 2 nights away from my dorm room! It really makes a difference being in a different environment. I should do this much more often! My great aunt is gone in FL until Jan., so that's why I really came... but next semester, even when she's here she said I can come over anytime, and I just might be doing that. Especially around exam times.

OK- Now it's 1am and I really should be getting to bed! woooops.
Tonight I'm very happy. I love my life and my awesome friends. Had a beyond wonderful phone convo with one friend last night and it just made me really happy--and i will stay happy for a long time!
i'm so random. this needs to end now!

college life at gordash

I am loving it here. I have 4 people that I hang out with constantly, and a bunch of other friends that have their own friends but are friends with me. It's hard to explain, but everyone is in their own little groups. I thought cliques were a highschool thing, but definitely not. Cliques are around the rest of your life I kinda think. It's fine because these 4 people are amazing and we're all really close! Becky, Kate, Andy, and Frank are the ones that I always hang with. Becky and Kate and I are like the same people in different bodies. We think alike and act alike and ... sometimes that can be skary?! :-) It's a blast being around them. And we're so close that we can sit and not say anything but it isn't awkward. I love that when you are so comfortable around people that you can be comfortable in silence. Silence can be voonderful at times.
Gordon is a little different than I expected. I'm not sure what I expected it to be like, but i have made friends very easily and at the beginning I was a little worried because I was hanging out with my friends all the time, and I wondered when I would ever have time to study. i wondered if people ever DO study in college. But now people do. It just took a while for people to start. My get-it-done quickly as soon as i can attitude is still with me. I already have most of my homework for my class on thursday done. I try to get things over with so i'll have time later to chill, but sometimes i try to do way too much and my brain/body can't handle it. College is making me drink more coffee. My body is okay on 7hrs of sleep now (When i used to have to get at least 8 to function well). College is teaching me to LOVE 20 min naps, and i try to fit as many 20min naps into my day! College is about learning how to live with someone you normally wouldn't choose to hang out with. My roommate and I are very different. Let me just say. But I love her. We get along great! So cool how God put them in my life right away! I met them at orientation and we have been inseperable since. They live in a different dorm than me, but we are always in each other's rooms. distance has nothing on us! lol;-) but yeah, they're super amazing girls.

WOW. I have never worked so hard in my life as I have these past 2 weeks. It seemed the work would NEVER end. The first quarter ended 2 weeks ago, along with my least favorit class (philosophy) which i celebrated... but I had to add another class on so now I have 18 credits for this semester. I don't know how some people can do 3hour lab classes. I'm not taking any science or math this year, that would destroy me i think!! I almost lost it on friday and i should've blogged then, because i felt really emo (lol) and i needed to rant. But this works too. I just was disappointed about something and i was REALLY not looking forward to this weekend because i thought i would have to work non-stop. I ended up finishing a major part of it yesterday, though, and finished this morning... so now i don't have much left to do except revise a paper, but i have until wednesday ...!!!

So I kinda thought I loved writing and I kinda thought I was okay at it, ... but apparently not so much? Writing in college is so different --- SO much harder. And I don't enjoy it as much. Which is sad. .. .. .So I was thinking about the whole plan to do journalism deal, and I don't know anymore. I've realized that no one here knows EXACTLY what they want to do when they leave college, though, so i'm not stressing about it. I would LIKE to know or have a plan though! I think PHOTO journalism would be amazing:-) Or like being a tv news anchor person.. .. something like that. News but not the writing part of it? eh, we'll see.

Thanksgiving in a few weeks!! I'm flying to chicago to see my sister Elisabeth. If it all works out, my 2 brothers, my sis Colleen, and maybe my sis Christiana are all gonna try to come too!! So we'll be without our parents, theo, & sarah (sad), but with each other! It'll be fantabulous. And my birthday's in like 2 weeks. happy about that!! but i don't really know what i'll be doing. And it's gonna be super weird without my rents and rest of family.
basically this blog is to say: I'm still alive, healthy and happy ... and having fun. I don't get off of campus near enough because i don't know enough people with cars, and i hate bugging the same 2 people ... so mostly i'm on campus and on weekends it gets a little boring, but it's cool. i'm planning on getting out of here for halloween! We might walk donw the road to a neighborhood and trick-or-treat. Not MIGHT... WE WILL. I'm gonna make it happen, AND me, becky & kate are gonna be PIRATES!!! So stoked. It'll be amazing. I say that a lot. But it really will. And On FRIDAY, andy's parents are brining him a car to use for the wknd so we are going into boston hopefully!!!!!!!! i haven't been there since school started. which is crazy since it's so close.
Gotta run! but i will try to blog more often. this felt good.

anticipation!

So I've been in the States for a while it seems.... Got here June 10 and have been doing nothing but traveling! Phoenix, AZ; San Luis Obispo & Bakersfield, California; NYC; Greenwich, CT; upstate NY--the Adirondacks; Boston, Rockport, Wenham, Beverly, and Magnolia, MA; Greenville, SC; Biloxi & Gulfport, MS; Baton Rouge, LA; Nashville & Murfreesboro, TN;
and now I'm in CT again at my aunt's. Am I tired of traveling yet? YES! I'd like to go back to MA tomorrow and start getting settled where I'm gonna be living the next 4 years... but I have to wait til the 15 or 16th to head up to Mass. I'm gonna need to shop for winter clothes, take some driving lessons, get my wisdom teeth taken out on the 17th, get my eyes checked, and other stuff.
I'll hopefully be getting a job (if it works out) from my great aunt who is 4 miles away from campus and i can't wait for that... I'll probably be doing stuff like yard work, which is great.
I've registered for my classes and it looks like i have to have 16 credit hours for first semester. I'm not exactly happy about that! Seems like a Lot of work and i don't know how i'm gonna do all that studying and still be able to hang out & have fun. --But I'll try to figure it out! It always works out in the end. So far it looks like i'm taking an Old Testament class, a class called Christianity, Character and Culture, a philosophy class, a writing & rhetoric class, and a French class. 5 classes. Hopefully I won't have to have class every day of the week. And I want to be able to take my classes in the morning.
I was told I would be in a triple (2 roommates) at first, but thankfully that got changed! Now I am only sharing with one girl who's from Georgia, and I'm very excited to meet her- -- she seems like she'll be pretty cool! ..... I just want to get it started! I feel like this summer has been dragging on and on... I'm not really sure why. The fun I've had didn't last long enough. Like my week in California and my 3 days in SC--WAY too short! Didn't get to spend near enough time with my friends. --But at least I got to see some of them. It's amazing how much traveling my family has done this summer. Last week we were at my uncle's lake house in TN and all of my brothers and sisters got to come there and at least spend a night. My WHOLE family was only really together for like 4 hours, but I got to spend quite a lot of time with each of them. My neice, Valerie Jane is the CUTEST kid! Loved seeing her... she calls me "Aunt Viva" (she's just learning how to talk, it's so adorable) and knows the names of all my other brothers & sisters too! I don't know how she keeps us all straight. She'll be 2 in another week.

I now know quite a few people going to Gordon since I went on La Vida at the end of June. Met a lot of incoming freshmen who got me even more excited about going to Gordon. I really feel like it's the right place for me to go. It's a gorgeous campus, has a great history, is in a nice part of MA, 10 mins from the beach (i know, it'll be FRIGID, but who cares...it's cool to say i'll be so close!), there are loads of ppl who told me they love it... i have relatives very close by... I'M EXCITED and I THINK I'M READY! Bring it!

Only 10 more days before I get to move into my dorm!!!!